nothing in particular. particularly nothing.

why do they call it a "tall" at starbucks when it's actually a small? i'm 5'0. do i get to call myself "tall"? no! of course not. whatever. so here's some personal information...my cervix is 80% thin. that means the baby is coming soon. maybe within a week! brian and i took childbirth prep on sunday. i had to stick my hand in a bag of ice for a minute and a half repeatedly to practice breathing through the pain. brian had to give me massages. we got to lie on the floor with pillows and blankets and watch a movie about birth. we both slept through it. the teacher said we get popsicles during labor and we can have as many as we want. i hope they're the kind with jokes on the sticks like "where do books sleep?" "under their covers!"
i was trying to do "nesting" today by cleaning my room and washing the baby's clothes in dreft. but the washer broke halfway through the cycle so i just put everything in the dryer. i don't even think anything got rinsed. that sort of defeats the purpose because now the baby's clothes prbably have more chemicals than if i had not bothered to wash them at all. oh well. i tried.

midgets and pregnant chicks

today i am really easily annoyed. i hate my job. i hate all the customers. like this californian guy on the phone who was like "can i talk to someone who really knows directions?" and i was like "where are you coming from?" and then he said that again like 3 more times. Do i just sound like i don't know where i work or how to get there? he didn't even give me a chance! and so i gave the phone to shea and let him give the directions. the guy was at some random intersection that no one even knew of. it's like, "one moment sir, let me activate the gps system in my brain. i've got this internal mapquest system in my fucking head that tells me exactly where you are, latitude and longitude and everything, hang on, would you like to know your precice elevation and the elevation gain from where you are to the bike shop, you know, just so you can be prepared in case you experience some altitude sickness along the way?" fucking californians. and he made it a point to let shea know that if shea were in california and wanted to know how to get to blah-blah-blah beach, he would be able to give accurate directions. whatever. when brian and i were in san diego we wanted to know how to get to the fish market and the girl on the phone was wrong. just because you live somewhere doesn't mean you know every spot in the city and how to get anywhere from that spot. why do people have to be so demanding and so rude?

and i'm so tired of being pregnant. it's like people just think they can talk to you about all kinds of personal issues just because you're pregnant. they ask you when you're due and is it a boy or a girl and is it your first and are you ready and are you excited and is your (indescreet glance at naked ring finger) um, partner(?) excited and do you have the name picked out and what is the name and aren't you just roasting in here and how is it being on your feet all day and does he kick and aren't you just ready to pop him out and are you going to have an epidural and on and on and on....

now, i realize that i stand out. i have a huge belly and it's pretty obvious that there's something in there besides pizza and ice cream and beer. but do total strangers have to comment on it all the time? take midgets for example. midgets, like pregnant women are rare and cute and interesting. they provoke many questions that i myself would love to ask. why are you so short is it hard finding clothes does it suck asking people to reach stuff for you can you drive do you have really low counters in your kitchen how do you use the urinals in public restrooms where do you buy your shoes do you like to hide in small spaces is it hard finding jobs have you thought about joining the circus do you have a boy/girlfriend is he/she a midget too don't you hate it when people stare at you? but out of basic respect for humans and their emotions i suck it up and refrain from asking these questions. and god knows i would never touch, poke or rub a complete stranger's belly!

ok, enough said. i feel better.